Bipolar kid

I’m on lithium 50 mg, in the morning, two pills at night, Zoloft 50 mg once a day, and then serttraline, one a day, then twice a night, and the elavil, so I can sleep because I don’t sleep. My boyfriend makes me take it when I get home because he knows I will be up all night.


I woke up this morning and realize I need to take my meds. Because I went off them for two days, the last time I went off, I cut myself. I feel like cutting myself right now. But it’s the brain, that I need the recalibration. I need to not take it so far. I don’t want that edge it’s like loving the thug, when I’m 30. It’s like loving the rebel with no cause, when I’m trying to have the house in the suburbs. This is so crazy. I’m so crazy. This is whatever.

Part of me hates this. Part of me thinks that I just want to be normal. But what is normal considering all the shit I’ve been though.