The American idol finale is coming on tonight. I know I need to go home but I’m afraid because I know I will drink. No witnesses. But I’ve been thinking about that no witnesses delusion because when you become a alkie, there are always witness. Shit, alkies go out and find them. Yea it would be great if I didn’t get on the phone, email or go outside and nobody new, but I guess that wouldn’t make me an alkie.
Anyways, the need for me to drink is really about routine. Back in the day on the show’s I love finales, I always drank with friends. But that was years ago. The friends are gone. If I go home, I’d be drinking by myself. I get that now. I’m not drinking tonight no matter what.
The complicated context of the "N" word.
11 years ago
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